Awkward Silence

I recently received free tickets to go see the Colorado Rockies play the Arizona Diamondbacks. My friend and I both received 2 tickets, so we set out to find people to go with us. There was this one guy that I really wanted to see it with so I invited him, but he had things going on and wasn’t able to make it. I was bummed because I thought this was a good chance to get to spend some time with a new friend.

This happens to us all more times than not. We invite people to something but they have plans or can’t make it. If you boil it down, people are just busy. All of us are busy. Life has this way of making our lives busy or maybe we feel accomplished for having busy lives and so we add things to our plate. Whatever the reason is, life is busy.

I was thinking about this as I was doing my daily devotion routine. You know, that list of things you do so you can feel close to God and better about yourself. Most of the time, if I’m honest, it just becomes a checklist of things to do in the morning. One morning I had finished reading my devotional book, listened to some worship music, wrote in my journal and ended in prayer. As I was ending in prayer I had this thought that I should just take time to wait and listen.

Without realizing it, the busyness of life had crept into my relationship with God. I became “busy” doing all these things to get close to God when all the while I think He just wanted me to sit, wait and be there. There are a lot of times where I am with friends or doing something but my head isn’t there. I’m thinking about things I have to do the next day or what needs to get done. The whole time I spending with God, I wasn’t really there.

I have started to take 10 minutes, whether in the morning or to take a break from the busy day I’m having, to just sit and listen. I try to keep my mind from wandering to other things and focus on God. At first, it is really awkward. I should be doing something with my life other than sitting here in silence for 10 minutes! But as I begin to take time to sit and listen, I notice the worries and stresses of the day begin to subside and its like I can see in my mind Jesus being elevated above everything else going on. And it’s in that awkward silence that I sense peace, comfort and dare I say, nearness to Jesus.

Psalm 46:10a

“Be still and know that I am God”